Differences

This shows you the differences between two versions of the page.

--- functioning:amnesia [2026/06/05 12:27] – removed - external edit (Unknown date) 127.0.0.1
+++ functioning:amnesia [2026/06/05 12:34] (current) – jaime
@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
+====== Amnesia ======
+(Namespace: [[functioning:start]])
+The barriers giving rise to [[headspace:Abyss]] take the form of mild dissociative amnesia. I have incomplete memory sharing with my [[headmates:start]]. This is what keeps them distinct from me, and protects me from the bad things they know.
+===== Significant past =====
+I have no concrete factual recall of my [[functioning:trauma]], and the only way I know what happened at all is because of [[functioning:trauma#nightmares]], [[functioning:trauma#aftermath]], what they've [[functioning:internal_communication|told]] me happened to them, and very sparse (but extant) objective evidence.
+===== Everyday life =====
+I do //not// have very severe daily-life inter-alter amnesia. I have what are sometimes called "grayouts" rather than blackouts: I dissociate, switch, and lose time, but the switches are gradual enough that most of what I need to remember to function has time to carry over. Rather than blacking out and waking up as someone else, I just get really intense mood swings, that also temporarily change my opinions, values, priorities, internal gender identity, felt sense of age, ideal body image, favorite color, and //some// of what I'm easily able to remember about my life and current situation without needing to actively remind myself. The only way I was even able to figure out for //sure// that I switch at //all// is because I'm constantly getting [[functioning:internal_communication|intrusive thoughts that sound like other people talking to me]] and which side of the conversation is under my voluntary control keeps suddenly changing every so often.
+My everyday-life amnesia used to be slightly more severe. As a child, I was always forgetting everything ever told to me, forgetting every task I was ever assigned, forgetting every face and voice and name I knew, and losing everything I ever took out of the house. There were a few times I did actually completely black out and wake up to discover I'd done something uncharacteristic. But these more severe symptoms cleared up as I grew up.
+===== Cognitive and emotional blindness =====
+My headmates have their own distinct thoughts and feelings that occur in parallel to mine but are mostly inaccessible to me. I have absolutely no idea what they're thinking or feeling at any given moment, unless either they voluntarily [[functioning:internal_communication|tell]] me, or I involuntarily switch to them.